Earlier this summer I was on a morning run. Dark clouds hinted at the threat of rain. They cast somber shadows across the valley that mirrored the feelings in my heart. At that time, I was in Utah helping to care for my father who was dying of cancer. He seemed to grow weaker by the day and now could no longer even get out of bed. Minimal movement caused him significant pain. I grieved for him and for me knowing that he would soon be gone. As I headed up the road back home a ray of sunshine burst through the canyon under the clouds. Immediately my spirits were lightened, seemingly symbolic of the tender mercies of the Lord that we as a family had been experiencing even while dealing with our grief. These rays did not dispel the clouds but they did hint at better times yet to come. The psalmist penned, “weeping may endure fora night, but joy cometh in the morning” (Psalms 30:5).
My topic this evening is this: How does the gospel of Jesus Christ bring us joy even in the midst of life’s trials?
Finding Joy Amidst Trials
Sister Kennedy Kingston, a full-time missionary from our stake serving in the Washington Seattle Mission recently wrote, “I love my Father in Heaven and my brother Jesus Christ so much! I get so overwhelmed with joy and a sense of gratitude that brings me to a humility deeper than any humility I've ever felt before. What I have learned is that the difficult and the best are not two separate experiences. It's the difficult and the best together that make serving a mission such an impactful and character changing experience. I have grown to deeply appreciate hard moments. It's in these moments that I feel myself changing and developing a more Christlike character” (September 2019).
For many years, I have been looking for joy while reading the scriptures. Every time I find a reference I mark it in pink and put it in a folder. As I have pondered repeatedly on these verses I have come to the conclusion that almost all these scriptures have a common theme of accessing the atonement of Jesus Christ. This is perfectly described by Pres. Nelson when he said, “when we can feel the Savior’s Atonement working in our lives, we will be filled with joy” (Pres. Nelson Oct 2016).
I would like to highlight three ways in which accessing the power of the atonement of Jesus Christ brings joy to our lives even amidst our darkest days. The first is through the process of repentance.
Repentance
This is what Sister Kingston was talking about when she states that she feels herself changing to become more Christlike. Pres. Nelson taught, “when we choose to repent, we choose to change! We allow the Savior to transform us into the best version of ourselves. We choose to grow spiritually and receive joy—the joy of redemption in Him. When we choose to repent, we choose to become more like Jesus Christ!” (Nelson April 2019).
Eve recognized the power of repentance and its pivotal role in the plan of salvation. After leaving the garden of Eden she declared, “were it not for our transgression we never should have had seed, and never should have known good and evil, and the joy of our redemption” (Moses 5:11).
My father was my boyhood hero and continues to be so today. I would do anything he asked me to do and yet he made it quite clear that he was not a perfect role model. He freely admitted that he had made mistakes in life and was trying to find his way on the path just like everyone else. He would never ask me to follow him but he certainly asked me to walk with him. It was from him that I learned about the Book of Mormon, Another Testament of Jesus Christ. It changed his life.
At my father’s memorial service the following verse from the mouth of the Savior Jesus Christ through the Prophet Moroni was printed on the program, which was a mantra in his life:
“And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them” (Ether 12:27).
Enduring Trials
The second way in which we find joy through the atonement of Jesus Christ is it’s enabling power that strengthens us while enduring trials.
Another one of my heroes is Dianne Falk who is in the Lindell Ward. She was baptized a member of the Church of Jesus Christ on December 29, 2004. Due to severe multiple sclerosis she required 4-5 elders in the font to help immerse her in the water. Her faith in following the plan is awe inspiring. Despite her disability she has managed to live on her own with some help, attend church regularly and loves to go to the temple. When I asked her to share with me how she finds joy, she answered, “When I am feeling low, I pray and I think about what is good in my life and I focus on that. I don't focus on the bad things in my life. I just don't think about being sick. I really don't. I get so many blessings when I go to the temple; or even when I go to church, that I just don't think about it. I know that serving is really important. The way I serve sounds really silly, but it really does work: I smile. I smile and I say, "Thank you" to everyone and I say, "Have a good day." Everybody tells me I am the kind girl that nothing seems to bother me. I think that's because I have affected their lives just by a smile” (Dianne Falk Oct 2019).
During my father’s illness he suffered a fractured sternum due to cancer in the bone. He then developed intractable hiccups that went on for many hours. Each one felt like a knife stabbing him in the chest. One night in particular, I prayed as I have never prayed before. Crying out in the name of the Lord I felt faith build in my soul and called on the powers of heaven to stop his misery. This combined with the prayers of so many others led to a huge improvement that very night. The next day was Sunday. Some of the priests in his ward came over to bless and give him the sacrament. As they pronounced the words of the prayer I felt an outpouring of love from our Savior Jesus Christ. I wept
with joy knowing and feeling that love for my father.
Serving Others
“When we are in the service of our fellow men,” declared King Benjamin, “we are only in the service of our God” (Mosiah 2:19). Helping others access the atonement of Jesus Christ is the third way in which we receive of his joy. “And now, if your joy will be great with one soul that you have brought unto me into the kingdom of my Father, how great will be your joy if you should bring many souls unto me!” (D&C 18:16).
This principle was brought to my mind when reading a letter from another one of our missionaries, Sister Megan Lofgreen who lost her grandfather at almost the same time that I lost my father. She wrote, “I wanted to bear my testimony about eternal families. Some of you may know that my grandpa passed away this past week. Obviously these things are always hard, but the day after he passed, we were at the temple explaining to our friend about how we can be sealed to our families forever. One of the other missionaries who didn't have any idea about my grandpa asked me why the sealing ordinance was important to me, and I got to bear my testimony that I know I will see my grandfather and all the rest of my loved ones again, and how death is not the end. I'm so grateful for the gospel and for eternal families!” This is why Elder Oaks pronounced, “Sharing the gospel is not a burden but a joy. What we call “member missionary work” is not a program but an attitude of love and outreach to help those around us” (Oct 2016).
My father was a great example to me of one who found joy in helping others. For most of his life he worked with the youth. There are countless examples of those he influenced. There was a time, though, when he grew discouraged and felt that he wasn’t able to connect with the youth as he had in years past. He went to the bishop and asked to be released. He was subsequently called to serve as the Sunday School President.
Not content to just assign teachers and ring the bell for the next class, he pondered about the gospel principles class for new and returning members. They didn’t really have anyone who was coming to that class. He systematically started visiting all the members of his ward who were not consistently attending church. He first became their friend and then one by one he would invite them to come to his class.
There was one family who didn’t make it to church much but showed an abundance of Christ like love in caring for their invalid mother. He was quite touched by their service. When they declared that they were “less active” he responded, “You are not less active in the gospel. You may not go to church but you are living a Christ like life.” While I was home caring for him, they sent my father a note thanking him for his love and for having more faith in them than they had in themselves. They have been regularly attending their church meetings now for many years and find joy in being stake family history missionaries.
By the end of that year, there were 20-30 people who regularly attended those classes. He helped many of them prepare to go to the temple. He often told me of the joy it was to attend with them.
One of the bright rays of sun that lit up my day during this time of gloom came from a message I received from a woman that I had the blessing of being able to teach in Guatemala 30 years earlier as a full time missionary. “Las familias son eternas usted nos lo enseño... gracias ...animo Elder Fuller algun dia abrazará de nuevo a su padre.” (Families are forever, you taught us that...thank you...take heart Elder Fuller you will one day embrace your father again!) Her words to me, reminded me of God’s love and brought joy just when I needed it most.
Conquering Darkness
I think that most of us understand these principles but what do we do when all we can see are dark clouds, when our hope has vanished and our faith is shaken? Losing my father has hit me harder than anything has before. I have never felt such an ache that seems to have dug a hole deep in my heart. Recently, one of our neighbors watched my three year old grandson Jack and asked him about his “other grandparents.” He responded that he had Grandma Dixie (my mother) and Grandpa Bob, but “he died and went to heaven.” “I’m so sorry,” she responded, “do you miss him.” Looking her square
in the eye he said, “Everyone misses Grandpa.”
In her talk at his memorial service my sister said the following, “I had never felt the sting of death so near and dear to me before. I really had no idea how sad sad can get. To be honest I was unprepared. In fact I felt blindsided. I knew my Dad would pass away at some point. We all do. He lived a full 81 years. So why was I feeling a sadness I didn’t know could penetrate so deep. I have concluded that it’s not actually sadness I’m feeling, but love. His passing has forced me to feel my entire lifetime’s sum of my father's unconditional love, all at once. A love that was spaced over 43 years is now condensed to one moment and my heart literally hurts to the point of bursting.”
Sister Megan Shipley, a member of the South Stake, described joy in this way shortly after her baptism, “While happiness may be rainbows and butterflies and a pleasant stroll through green pastures, the Lord did not promise us happiness. He said, "Man is that he might have joy." And joy is found in the midst of a storm when we can remember our Savior who sacrificed his life for us that we may live. Joy is found while trudging through thick muddy waters knowing that God loves us enough to put us in this world that we may learn and grow. Joy is powerful because it is true and eternal and can impact the hearts and souls of men everywhere” (Talk given in Parkway Ward July 25, 2010).
Nephites in the Land Bountiful
I would like to conclude by reviewing the account of the Nephites who were visited by the Lord Jesus after his resurrection.
This was a group of people who had cause to mourn. They had just lost their families, friends, their homes. Widespread destruction had wiped out their cities and the land was covered in a thick darkness that was so dense that no light could be seen or fire could be lit (3 Nephi 8:22). Their howlings were described as “great and terrible.” They heard the voice of the Lord plead for them to repent and turn unto him. As they did so “their mourning was turned into joy” (verse 10).
They gained strength from one another as they gathered in the land Bountiful at the temple. In a miraculous fashion, Jesus descended from the heavens and appeared before them. Each one witnessed for themselves that he was their Redeemer. They felt the tokens in his hands and feet. They embraced him.
He instructed them regarding his doctrine and invited them to participate in the ordinances of his gospel. They were baptized, they received the gift of the Holy Ghost. He instituted the sacrament among them. As he prepared to leave them he gathered them around him in a circle and as they knelt before him, he healed their wounds. What happened next is one of my father’s favorite passages of scriptures. On the day of my father’s passing, my family and I gathered around his bed and we read these verses together:
And it came to pass that when they had knelt upon the ground, he prayed unto the Father,
And after this manner do they bear record: The eye hath never seen, neither hath the ear heard, before, so great and marvelous things as we saw and heard Jesus speak unto the Father; And no tongue can speak, neither can there be written by any man, neither can the hearts of men conceive so great and marvelous things as we both saw and heard Jesus speak; and no one can conceive of the joy which filled our souls at the time we heard him pray for us unto the Father (3 Nephi 17:15-17)
When Jesus finished praying he looked on the multitude and said:
Blessed are ye because of your faith. And now behold, my joy is full.
And when he had said these words, he wept, and the multitude bare record of it, and he took their little children, one by one, and blessed them, and prayed unto the Father for them.
And when he had done this he wept again;
And he spake unto the multitude, and said unto them: Behold your little ones. And as they looked to behold they cast their eyes towards heaven, and they saw the heavens open, and they saw angels descending out of heaven as it were in the midst of fire; and they came down and encircled those little ones about, and they were encircled about with fire; and the angels did minister unto them (verses 20-24).
Brothers and Sisters, I bear testimony that we can feel joy even while experience overpowering grief. The joy that the Savior brings to our life will break through our dark clouds of despair as the rays of the morning sun. Furthermore, as we reach out to those around us, together we are able to more fully feel the warmth of his love and the joy of our redemption. I pray that we may all seek to access the atonement of Jesus Christ in our lives each and every day. In his holy name. Amen.
As a young 18 year old freshman at Brigham Young University I fell hard for a gorgeous girl from Missouri. Gina and I dated most of that freshman year but then I packed up and left her and everything else in my life to spend two years as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I knew that my chance of getting her back at the end of those two years was slim but I was hopeful. What I thought was love then grew only deeper as I focussed my energies on serving my Savior, Jesus Christ. 
In recent years I have pondered the passage in John where Jesus teaches, “A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you” (John 13:34). This was taught shortly before his atonement and resurrection. This was to be a higher law. I may love my wife with all my heart but that doesn’t come close to the love that Jesus has for each one of us. His love is infinite and eternal. His love is patient and kind. It is long suffering, never faltering. It soothes and heals and makes us whole. No matter how hard I try, I will never be able to love as he loved. 
The only way for me to have the love that Jesus has is if He gives me that love. The prophet Mormon taught this concept as he implored, “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true followers of his Son, Jesus Christ; that ye may become the sons of God; that when he shall appear we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is; that we may have this hope; that we may be purified even as he is pure” (Moroni 7:47). 
Thirty two years ago when I completed my time as a missionary, I certainly didn’t know nor understand what I do today but I had a glimpse of what could become. Early in our reacquaintance, I found myself on a ski lift asking this remarkable woman, “So what are you doing for the next 45,000 years?” A bit awkward of a pick up line but my meager attempt to broach the subject of forever has become a symbol of our goal to achieve an everlasting love. The number is engraved inside the ring that she wears declaring her status as my wife and I engraved it on the bottom of this wood carving that was inspired by my attempt to love her purely. 
